A work in progress

Hello again internet world! It's been a few months, but not for lack of trying. I've spared this particular outlet from the mess of emotions and thoughts that these last months have been. My journal was not so lucky. The highlight events are pretty significant: an international move and an on-going career change.  The spiritual, emotional, and physical effects of these events bring about daily victories and defeats. And the lessons I'm being forced to learn....where do I begin? Waiting.       "Wait for the Lord; be strong, and let your heart take courage; wait for the Lord!" Psalm 27:14 I'm taking a break from teaching because I feel beat down and exhausted. My current circumstances are unique in that I have the resources and family support to take some time to retreat, to renew my mind, body, and soul. I get to wait and look to Jesus to mend my brokenness and show me the next steps to take. Thank you, Lord, for this precious gift of time to recover. An...

The infinity of God is a curious thing. I know it will remain a mystery since I am a finite being. Even more constricting, I’m a finite being with a compulsion to analyze and organize. That works out just fine when I’m looking to make connections with a few variables. But God has infinite variables that connect perfectly to include a master plan for the universe, which involves details about my role, purpose, and place in that universe. When I feel unsettled within my role, purpose or place, the vastness of His being and His plans overwhelm me. I attempt to sort out the single aspect of God's identity that will give me clarity and direction. I usually find countless aspects that could send me down multiple avenues, all of which could be "right", crippling my comfort zone of sorting through the options until I've chosen correctly. So I wander, seemingly aimless, begging to be told what to do so that I don't have to bear the responsibility for choosing poorly.  Du...

Not sure about the rest of you, but I keep waiting to feel  like I'm the age that I actually am. "Thirty-five" sounds mature. Confession….I don't feel  mature. I feel like I need to rebel against my age. Am I alone? I see this picture. And I think about my chosen career. I should feel  my age. But I don't. Maybe someday I will. Maybe. 

Only pictures today. These are snapshots of my current home through some changing seasons. Each of those seasons hold both joys and sorrows. Each snapshot holds a season of lessons learned, memories made, and gratitude that God is faithful, no matter the season of my heart. 

…makes no difference who you are. Anything your heart desires, will come to you. It's a lovely thought, but so not true. I think that the real truth goes something like this: When you give your life to Christ, your hopes and dreams morph into His plans for your life. And the great thing is that His plans are so much better than anything you could have come up with on your own. Not sure that it would fit into a catchy tune that half the world would recognize, but truth none the less. I've been thinking back to my time at LeTourneau a lot lately. It may be because a dear friend that I met during college will be moving to Prague this summer. It may also be because my next birthday brings about a number that I'm actually struggling with a bit. Despite the reason why, my mind has been reliving a few ridiculous and fantastic adventures from that season of my life. Those memories have also reminded me of my college dreams, the biggest one being marriage and family. But that ...

Due to my current circumstances, I've developed the habit of listening to music almost constantly. I live alone, and when the silence gets to be too much, I press play. I walk and ride public transportation, surrounded by lovely people who speak a language I do not understand, so I throw those earbuds in and listen to the soundtrack of my life. The lyrics provide the conversations I can't have and the music provides the metronome to walk, run, and dance. I usually listen to the albums I've purchased on iTunes in one giant, shuffled playlist. There are 1340 minutes of music available at the moment but I can't get enough of a specific 4 and half minutes. "Our God is able, more than capable to be faithful to the end. He'll finish what He started." (MercyMe) When these lyrics travel through my headphones to my ears, they don't just pass through. These words land in my heart. And as I've been meditating on the lyrics along with Philippians 1:6...

Saying goodbye was tough. My dad got some awkwardly wonderful pictures of tears running down my face as I said goodbye to my parents in the Houston airport on Tuesday. If he sends them to me, I'll post them, cause I bet they'll make you smile. As I hugged their necks, I knew in my heart that I was making one of the best choices of my life, but my gut told me that getting on this plane was a huge mistake. Wrestling with those conflicting thoughts and all the emotions that come with them left me pretty drained. I arrived in Prague on Wednesday night, worn out from the traveling and still in a bit of shock at how relatively quickly I just overhauled my life. Once I got a chance to call the folks, I found out they had to put Luna down that morning which also happened to be their anniversary. She was a good dog - 17 years old. She'd been part of the family for half my life. After an emotionally draining start, I'm finding my stride here.  I've officially moved into my ap...