A work in progress

Not sure about the rest of you, but I keep waiting to feel  like I'm the age that I actually am. "Thirty-five" sounds mature. Confession….I don't feel  mature. I feel like I need to rebel against my age. Am I alone? I see this picture. And I think about my chosen career. I should feel  my age. But I don't. Maybe someday I will. Maybe. 

Only pictures today. These are snapshots of my current home through some changing seasons. Each of those seasons hold both joys and sorrows. Each snapshot holds a season of lessons learned, memories made, and gratitude that God is faithful, no matter the season of my heart. 

…makes no difference who you are. Anything your heart desires, will come to you. It's a lovely thought, but so not true. I think that the real truth goes something like this: When you give your life to Christ, your hopes and dreams morph into His plans for your life. And the great thing is that His plans are so much better than anything you could have come up with on your own. Not sure that it would fit into a catchy tune that half the world would recognize, but truth none the less. I've been thinking back to my time at LeTourneau a lot lately. It may be because a dear friend that I met during college will be moving to Prague this summer. It may also be because my next birthday brings about a number that I'm actually struggling with a bit. Despite the reason why, my mind has been reliving a few ridiculous and fantastic adventures from that season of my life. Those memories have also reminded me of my college dreams, the biggest one being marriage and family. But that ...

Due to my current circumstances, I've developed the habit of listening to music almost constantly. I live alone, and when the silence gets to be too much, I press play. I walk and ride public transportation, surrounded by lovely people who speak a language I do not understand, so I throw those earbuds in and listen to the soundtrack of my life. The lyrics provide the conversations I can't have and the music provides the metronome to walk, run, and dance. I usually listen to the albums I've purchased on iTunes in one giant, shuffled playlist. There are 1340 minutes of music available at the moment but I can't get enough of a specific 4 and half minutes. "Our God is able, more than capable to be faithful to the end. He'll finish what He started." (MercyMe) When these lyrics travel through my headphones to my ears, they don't just pass through. These words land in my heart. And as I've been meditating on the lyrics along with Philippians 1:6...

Saying goodbye was tough. My dad got some awkwardly wonderful pictures of tears running down my face as I said goodbye to my parents in the Houston airport on Tuesday. If he sends them to me, I'll post them, cause I bet they'll make you smile. As I hugged their necks, I knew in my heart that I was making one of the best choices of my life, but my gut told me that getting on this plane was a huge mistake. Wrestling with those conflicting thoughts and all the emotions that come with them left me pretty drained. I arrived in Prague on Wednesday night, worn out from the traveling and still in a bit of shock at how relatively quickly I just overhauled my life. Once I got a chance to call the folks, I found out they had to put Luna down that morning which also happened to be their anniversary. She was a good dog - 17 years old. She'd been part of the family for half my life. After an emotionally draining start, I'm finding my stride here.  I've officially moved into my ap...

As I prepare to move my life overseas for 3 years, my mind has been full. That's to be expected; but one thought in particular has consumed much of my conscious processing time - "By choosing to move to Prague, I've closed the door for good on marriage." As I've been processing this statement, I went through a few stages, but here's what I landed on.  First of all, who am I to make those kind of statements?!? In Romans 9, Paul makes it clear that the clay doesn't tell the potter what to do or what it should be. He's talking about how Israel will always be His chosen people, but by His mercy, we were grafted into the plan. It really hits home, in verse 23, with a reason why we are designed in a certain way or given certain circumstances: "And He did so to make known the riches of His glory upon vessels of mercy, which He prepared beforehand for glory". Singleness is a circumstance, not an identity. The weight of my "closed door" sta...

I prefer simple. Losing my mind feels like a strong possibility if there are too many potential outcomes produced from an equal number of potential processes. Circumstances, on occasion, present themselves in such a way that multi-tasking appears to be the most efficient solution, causing any thoughts I currently posses to hide among the fog that now occupies my brain. Like I said, I prefer simple. Moving is NOT simple. It's a constant multi-step process of decision-making. Should I keep? Should I sell? Should I ship? Should I store? Why do I even own this? And all of these questions lead up to the mother of all moving questions: How do I say goodbye well? In the midst of trying to take care of every one of my material possessions, I'm also trying to communicate love and appreciation to those that have invested in me and those that I've invested in. Emotionally, I'm spent. Mentally, I'm exhausted. Physically, I'm dragging. And spiritually, a Psalm is beating m...